The Biggest Lie I've Ever Told

I'd love to say I've never lied. I'd love to but we're all guilty of at least a few lies in our lifetime and I'm no exception. While it's true I've never told what I consider to be a whopper, like soap opera material, the little white lies are just as destructive in their own way. 

The biggest I lie I've ever told? "I'm fine" when sometimes, honestly, I'm anything but fine. It happens everyday in different forms. "How're you doing?" "Good!" It's my generic, go to answer. Good, fine... all deflecting words. 

Partly this is due to an underlying belief I've just uncovered. Sometimes I actually think that nobody cares about the truth. That even though people ask how I'm doing, they don't really want a deep, meaningful conversation about my life, my struggles. My, you know, realness. They just want a happy, "all is well with my world" sort of answer. And, when I say this out loud, it sounds ridiculous. I know that it can be true but I also know that it is unhealthy of me to think everyone is this way. They're not. 

Still, how are we ever going to have these real and deep relationships when we are so... fake about our lives? If all we are ever saying is "I'm fine and things are awesome." how are we going to connect to other people in a meaningful way? Friendship is not forged in the projecting of perfection. The roots of friendship are grown by sharing struggles. 

I challenge you, and myself, to take the words fine and good and okay out of our vocabulary. Let's have honest-to-goodness conversations with our friends that show them we care what their days are filled with. 

We can't encourage others if we don't ever truly speak the truth to each other.

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